Sometimes you wanna go

where everybody knows your name...

Ya know, I used to be SET when I turned the WB11 on television at 11 o'clock every night. Friends - Will & Grace - Frasier - Sex & the City - Everybody Loves Raymond - Cheers - everything was perfect. I would fall asleep in bed to the most entertaining shows...

Now, I'm lucky to get an hour and a half of good quality television at night. I've got the "CW11" on now and this just sucks. I got three shows surrounded by cartoons and George Lopez. And more George Lopez. I can't really just blame the channel for changing the shows or anything. Truth is, the shows just aren't around anymore.

When these shows got cancelled along with The Nanny and such, where were the replacements? The great comedies that started in the 90s are over and there are no new ones here to take there place. The only new shows on TV anymore are reality! Not that I don't love me a good episode of Top Chef of Model each week, but I wish I had to think just a little bit more - maybe get a little passionate about some people that I don't know. Here we are, thrilled about the SATC movie, and it's really because we MISS the characters that we could follow around and love. I can't love the idiots that come and go on a reality show for a season.

So, this clearly is the most retarded thing to write about in the world...but I'm awake cause I've got a paper to write (ONE WEEK TO GO!!!) and there is NO MORE television to keep me going. I've got friggen Poison Ivy with a trashy Drew Barrymore on. So very depressing lol.

soooooo

so, it's been almost a year since i wrote in here - how can that be? well, i know how that can be, really - life gets hard, my schedule is crazy, i have no time to even call my friends...but hey, i'm drunk enough right now to realize that i should write something down

i went to a SWEET 16 this evening!! can you believe that - i'm 23. just turned, actually, about a week ago. ian and i went to TCI for my birthday and it was wonderful - we went horseback riding on the beach, scuba diving, para-sailing, conch diving, got massages, it was all lots and lots of fun. BUT i even had to bring some HW with me. school has been absolutely crazy, totally taken over my life. i actually had two projects to work on while we were away, boo.

almost done with year number one! it's been absolutely insane, but i must say, i'm proud to say that i can match hair, fingerprints, DNA samples, i can blood type, identify glass, fibers and crystals. it's really pretty cool - in a TOTALLY dorky way.

so my ex-boyfriend thinks that i'm a bitch for not calling to let him know that i started dating someone new. i dunno, i guess i just didn't think that was news he would want to hear ASAP. i thought that not talking about it was better, less hurtful and not as bitchy as he seems to think i am. i really just don't know what to do about the situation anymore - i'm trying to be the responsible, respectful one and NOT put our friends in the middle of this crap, yet he feels the need to convince people to choose sides. of course they will if you're bitching about what an awful person i am and i'm not saying a word - my bad, thought i was doing the respectful thing.

...post #100...

I've actually written more posts in this blog, but unfortunately had to delete some last year - since they may have gotten me fired from Res Life. I guess that was silly anyhow, given the last few weeks events.

I must say, I am totally sick and tired of talked about and dwelling on what happened with my RA job in May. But I will put it in writing once. I am so broken-hearted about what happened. This whole year on staff was really a disappointment for me, but the premature ending was simply depressing. I found my first year on staff to be unbelievable enjoyable and rewarding and I was hoping to be able to continue that this year. And then when we met Carrie, I thought this year could only be better. Who knew...

Oh well...

So, Mike and I had a GREAT night tonight. Guess where we went for dinner!? Guess! OK, I'll tell you - Perilla! Anyone remember Top Chef: Ssn 1??? It's Harold's new restaurant! It opened up last month in the West Village. And it was amazing! The atmosphere is lovely, the food was delicious and Harold was actually there :) He was in th kitchen and popped his head out a few times. And Mike got me a surprise - he asked Harold to sign a menu for me - and HE DID :) YEHHHHHH. Oh that was fun. And damn, the food was so good.

So, there it is. (Unofficial) blog #100. I had an amazing evening and am enjoying my summer so much. Spending time with Mike and Kelley in the city...going to Yankees games whenever I can...looking for an apartment with Leah...going on vacation (ps, Vegas was amazing last week! I love the Playboy club)...working with babies... It's all good.

In response to your concerns...

I am so so sad about graduation. I'm in shock about it. I really just can't believe that it's over...is it? My life isn't changing too much - I'm continuing my studies next year, so I'll still have classes to attend and things to learn. I'm going to be living in Manhattan so I don't need to feel uncomfortable in a strange city. I'm living with one of my best friends, so I don't have to meet awkward new people from Craig's list.

I can and did control those things. But everything around me is changing. Genna is back in Philly and will not come to visit. Mike is looking for work and not school. Tara is moving away. My best friends that are still at Fordham still have to deal with the retarded reprecussions of my birthday party. And dozens of people have left and are not coming back. They're just not.

And I can't stop it. And I still can't stop crying.

Right now, he's probably up behind her with a pool stick showing her how to shoot a combo

It's such a beautiful day. I wake up and see that it is sunny and warm, so I put on my favorite green and white VS dress and little heels and go outside to clear my head for a little while before going to work in the office for a few hours.

But then, on my way out, the city has turned on me. It's pouring. It's thundering and lightning and I can't see out my window. The sky opened up and everyone is crying. And I'm crying. Because it's not as it seemed. It was supposed to be beautiful and happy and perfect.

But it's not. It's wet and scary and everything's wrong.

Right now, he's probably buyin' her some fruity little drink 'cause she can't shoot wiskey

helloooooooo

It's been so so long and I don't even have the time to be doing this now, but I feel a sense of urgency to get something in here :)

It's been a fun two weeks. I got my official letter of acceptance to John Jay! Yeh, I really do have a future now! And that also means I have to go apartment hunting...I will most likely be living with Leah and/or Gabby which is pretty awesome.

I hung out with Vicky last weekend! I haven't seen that hotty in like 4 months, so that was fun. We had a lot of catching up to do and after several drinks and hours of discussion, we've arrived at a fabulous conclusion...boys suck. So true.

My 22nd birthday came and went! Well, I'm calling it 21, part 2, because I really see no point in being any older than 21. The prom was pseudo-successful. We had a BLAST, all the important people came - even Kristen :) It was a super dance fest in fun dresses. (ps, I wore my Sweet 16 dress, totally still fit.) It was only a pseudo-success, because my bosses found out about the party (which, btw, was in Astoria) and they've threatened to fire us for drinking with underage people. Forgive me, I invited my friends and while some of them are not 21, we were in fucking Astoria, not my apartment. So Stupid!

More to come, I promise! As soon as final papers and such are DONE!!!!!

Dear Sally,

I was home last week for Easter break and watching TV verrry late at night, when I saw that Felicity was on. Normally, I probably would have skipped over it, but the info looked like the pilot episode so I flipped to the channel. Well, it was. The first two episodes were on at like 4 in the morning and I really enjoyed watching them both.

I was thinking to myself, wow I used to love this show...I can't believe it's already been four years since I first watched this episode. Ya know, four years ago when Felicity and I started our freshman year. Whoops, no it was actually EIGHT years ago, I remembered. I was a freshman in high school when Felciity started her first year at "the university of new york". I remember thinking about how badly I wanted to be her...I was so ready to live in NY on my own and get a degree and fall in love (with the RA). My senior year of high school was Felicity's senior year at college. (Wisely,) the show ended there with her graduation and moving into the real world. That summer, I was getting ready to do exactly what she had started four years earlier.

Fast-forward to spring of 2007. Here I am - it's time to graduate. I have three full weeks of classes, one week of finals and one senior week ending in the inevitable graduation day.

Part of me is SO excited that it's time to move on. I've been accepted to graduate school and am going to get an apartment in the city with a great friend. It's so post-Felicity, pre-Sex and the City. Just kidding, I better not be single at age 35 lol. But, another (maybe larger) part of me is devistated. I'm sad to leave so many friends (and that so many will leave me). I'm sad that life has become more serious. I'm sad that I'm more than half-way to being 40. I'm sad that one day I'll have to get a real job and pay off loans. I'm sad that-

Now what?