Happy December
An old friend IMed the other day about my blog. He was sad that we weren't as close anymore as we used to be, but happy that he had a way to keep in touch with me by reading it. This friend and I used to hang out practically every day and it's sad to see how our relationship has changed. Now I wonder, how have I changed? I obviously had something to do with the disintegration of our friendship...
I think that the most influential factor in our friendships is - sadly - our romantic relationships. How many of us have lost touch with a friend simply because they're tangled up with a new boy/girlfriend? I know that I have. When I started my first serious relationship with Joe (sophomore year of HS), my mom wouldn't allow me to see him everyday. I would always get so mad at her - because that's of course all I wanted to do - but she constantly called me out on it when I hadn't spent enough time with my friends. Guys come and go, but...you know. Anyway, I don't feel like I've ever ditched my friends for a guy - a fact that actually usually pisses off the guy I'm dating. But, if you want to be with me, that's a ground rule. Unless there's an emergency or a ring on my finger, my friends come first.
So, that's not my problem. How have I changed? I think I'm much more independent than I was in the past. I've grown up a lot this year. I'm sure that statement will make some of my friends laugh, but it's true. For the first time I feel like I'm really comfortable being me. God, that sounds super-cheesy, but I can't help it. I was so proud of myself the first time that I decided to confront someone about a problem I was having with them. It seems like something so little, but it was a big deal for little ol' me.
Different things are important to me. High school was all about what everyone else thought of you (at least for me it seemed to be) and I'm glad that's over. I still know a lot of judgemental people, but now it doesn't affect me the way it used to. Susie Q isn't a raging bitch for the rest of the semester if she tells a mutual friend that I said something behind her back. (Omg do you remember 3way calling?) If John Doe knows that I have a crush on him, it's not the end of the world. That stuff doesn't matter as much anymore.
I guess these are probably really generic things that everyone feels about themselves as well. If we were BFF a few years back and haven't talked in awhile, I know that you're going through the same things I am. So much can change in just a year.
I think that the most influential factor in our friendships is - sadly - our romantic relationships. How many of us have lost touch with a friend simply because they're tangled up with a new boy/girlfriend? I know that I have. When I started my first serious relationship with Joe (sophomore year of HS), my mom wouldn't allow me to see him everyday. I would always get so mad at her - because that's of course all I wanted to do - but she constantly called me out on it when I hadn't spent enough time with my friends. Guys come and go, but...you know. Anyway, I don't feel like I've ever ditched my friends for a guy - a fact that actually usually pisses off the guy I'm dating. But, if you want to be with me, that's a ground rule. Unless there's an emergency or a ring on my finger, my friends come first.
So, that's not my problem. How have I changed? I think I'm much more independent than I was in the past. I've grown up a lot this year. I'm sure that statement will make some of my friends laugh, but it's true. For the first time I feel like I'm really comfortable being me. God, that sounds super-cheesy, but I can't help it. I was so proud of myself the first time that I decided to confront someone about a problem I was having with them. It seems like something so little, but it was a big deal for little ol' me.
Different things are important to me. High school was all about what everyone else thought of you (at least for me it seemed to be) and I'm glad that's over. I still know a lot of judgemental people, but now it doesn't affect me the way it used to. Susie Q isn't a raging bitch for the rest of the semester if she tells a mutual friend that I said something behind her back. (Omg do you remember 3way calling?) If John Doe knows that I have a crush on him, it's not the end of the world. That stuff doesn't matter as much anymore.
I guess these are probably really generic things that everyone feels about themselves as well. If we were BFF a few years back and haven't talked in awhile, I know that you're going through the same things I am. So much can change in just a year.
posted by Bellezza at 10:33 PM
2 Comments:
I feel special that i am now part of your blog :)
i heart you!
oh, and since I go off on tangents and forget some of my points along the way...the end of a romantic relationship also ruins some friendships. if it's a bad breakup and you end up having to chose between the exes...
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